UCD Alumni Buddy Programme: The Gift of Friendship

The UCD Alumni Buddy Programme brings together local alumni and incoming international students. Its purpose is to provide friendly support to students during their stay in Dublin, to help them get to know the local community and to take part in a cultural exchange. Read on and discover how the enriching programme was the catalyst for Ita and Tlamelo’s blossoming friendship.

Ita Gibney (BA 1974)

"I graduated from UCD in 1974 and I plan to celebrate this milestone in September in the O'Reilly Hall on campus. It was Tony O'Reilly’s Gift to UCD that made this building possible. He passed away recently but this landmark building is a testament to his foresight and legacy. Recently I was there as a guest of Dr Tlamelo Malima for her graduation from the UCD School of Medicine. It was fitting and memorable to take photos there of us, now two alumni, graduating 50 years apart, given how our friendship began in UCD. It was thanks to a UCD Alumni initiative, that Tlamelo and I met and became 'buddies', as the UCD Alumni Buddy Programme might call us.

Six years ago, just as Tlamelo set foot on campus as an international student having come on her own from Botswana, I received an email from UCD Alumni calling on local alumni to come to a welcome meeting for the new international students. It was hosted in an effort to bring together past graduates and incoming international students to support the students during their time in UCD, to help them get to know the local community and to have a cultural exchange. The role and purpose of the alumni buddy was simple and not too prescriptive. The alum simply volunteered to be a contact for a selected student, perhaps introducing them to Irish culture and places, on hand for advice and a personal link and support to them as they navigate a new country and entry to university life with all the challenges those entail.

I immediately saw the value of the programme. Many years ago I was a postgraduate international student myself at Boston University. A Boston doctor (of Irish descent) Dr John McDonald, (who I met through his daughter Nancy) virtually adopted me! I was included in all his (large!) family events - including Christmas and Thanksgiving. I recall his generosity and intelligent interest in all things Irish. He was extremely well read and we had many conversations about The Troubles in Northern Ireland. His daughter and I became friends for life. His friendship gave me a lifeline of support and inclusion during a stressful college period and was a formative influence on my life and especially on my enjoyment of my time doing my Masters in Boston University.

So off I went out to UCD to this meet-and-greet session for the UCD Alumni Buddy Programme. The meeting was a kind of 'speed dating' for the old and the new! I was drawn in by the stories of past 'buddies' and was simply 'gotten' when Tlamelo bounced into the chair at my table, beaming and open! She was starting pre-med and had just arrived from Botswana on a scholarship. I knew the student years would be long and demanding as my own two brothers had done medicine in UCD."

"That first meeting was the foundation stone of a friendship that grew to be a true gift to both of us for her six years of UCD life. The friendship extended also to my family - my three adult children and even my dog Layla! Tlamelo spent many Christmases with us, including even the pandemic Christmas when we sat six feet apart over dinner with the doors and windows open! Tlamelo added to the party - one year reciting her poem and sharing top music hits from Botswana.

We had lots of experiences and adventures together but never felt a burden on each other. I still work full time in my own PR business while she had a heavy study workload. But we made time to have fun. We walked Howth Head and Killiney Hill, took lots of photos on an Autumn day in stunning Glendalough, and dipped our feet in the sea in Brittas Bay (Botswana is a landlocked country so the cold Irish sea was a new experience for Tlamelo). I was introduced by Tlamelo to Bastille at a concert in 3Olympia (I had never heard of them!). We had a ball seeing Lizzo together in 3Arena and my Spotify in the car often brought me up to speed on Tlamelo’s favourite latest songs as we headed on little trips. My affectionate golden retriever, Layla, may have played the role of a therapy dog during exam times when Tlamelo dropped by to walk and mind her. 

Tlamelo was always open to new Irish experiences - running the Ladies Mini Marathon, absorbing the collection in the Hugh Lane Gallery and the Francis Bacon studio there as well as The National gallery, tapping her feet in Johnny Foxes, petting the living legend Irish racehorse Beef or Salmon in his retirement field in the National Stud, and discovering Borgia's fish and chips in Donnybrook. We marched together with thousands of young people shouting to be heard in the Friday Climate emergency protest. We shared stories from our very different lives and I was delighted to get texts from Tlamelo when she won the silver medal for fencing on the UCD Fencing Team and when she passed her exams each time. 

When the pandemic hit, it was a huge disruption to Tlamelo's university stay. When borders were closing all over the world Botswana recalled all its students at very short notice. I recall us collecting all Tlamelo's boxes of belongings from her residence in UCD to store in our garden shed. All masked up and wearing surgical gloves that day, the only one she could hug to say goodbye to was the dog. 

Our friendship and mutual respect grew during her time in Dublin and I came to admire her courage and resilience. When study got tough and pressure was intense she learned a lot about herself. Apart from the friends she made, and notwithstanding her fierce independence, I am sure she had lonely periods so far away from family. So I was absolutely delighted when her mother made it all the way from Botswana for her recent graduation. She must have been so proud of this young woman.

Tlamelo and I drove recently to Sligo with the car packed to capacity where she now starts the first stage of her career as a young doctor. Her kindness and compassion and her intelligence will be an enormous asset in her medical career. A future trip for me will someday be to visit Botswana which looks so beautiful!

I am so grateful to my alma mater UCD for its Alumni Buddy Programme. The gift of this enriching friendship was a very special and unexpected blessing in my life and a living example of UCD connections."

Tlamelo Malima (MB BCh BAO 2024)

"About a week after my acceptance letter, I received an email about the UCD Alumni Buddy Programme which was made for international students to meet local Irish alumni as a form of voluntary mentorship. On 12 September 2018, I met Ita Gibney (my buddy, friend and adoptive family) at the Alumni Buddy Welcome Event. Looking back, I'm glad we both decided to be buddies because she made living in Ireland feel like home.

Ita is a beautiful Irish woman with a very warm soul. I felt welcomed whenever I was with her and never needed to hide the parts of myself I felt a bit embarrassed about. She has a great taste in music and she loves everything relating to art and theatre. I would describe Ita and her family as Bruce Springsteen's biggest fans. They’ll never skip his concerts in Ireland. And let's not forget her beautiful golden retriever, Layla whom I adore so much.

In the 6 years that we have known each other, we slowly cultivated our friendship. Ita gave me so much valuable advice as she had been an international student when she went to study in America. She knew exactly the worries I had about moving far away from family and gave me so much advice on coping with any stressors I might face. She gave me lots of recommendations of where to buy groceries, places to visit, events to check out and much more. 

Every month we would check in our busy schedules to do an activity of which many were new experiences for me at the time. From hiking to Howth, going to Art Galleries (Hugh Lane is my favourite because I was surprised how artistically messy Francis Bacon's room was), taking a dip in the cold sea and even going to my first concert (Bastille, my favourite band). We always shared parts of our lives, culture, interests, favourite memories etc.

Even the terrifying times of Covid did not cease the friendship we had built. When the lockdown was announced in March 2020, I called Ita in a hurry telling her that I was leaving Ireland to go to Botswana in 24 hours. Ita urgently assisted me by collecting my packed belongings for storage. It was difficult to say goodbye to her as I didn't know if I would ever come back to Ireland due to remote learning. However, distance was not a barrier for us. We stayed in touch with texts and calls showing each other the new hobbies and activities we did. When I came back to Ireland in September, we sporadically met each other at a distance with masks. We both valued our safety and our friendship did not waver.

The holidays were definitely the most difficult as an international student. I haven't spent Christmas or New Year with my family since coming to Ireland. As much as the end of semester exams would distract me from being homesick, I couldn't deny being envious of all the other students who spent the holidays with their family. Ita and her family invited and welcomed me to their Christmas dinner each year. They even catered to my dietary needs and asked me how we celebrate Christmas in my home country. I absolutely loved it. The food, the games and music but most importantly, I didn't feel alone. I'll forever be grateful for this."

Make a Difference

You can also make a positive impact by helping international students adjust to life in Ireland. You can register your interest in the next Buddy programme at here: (opens in a new window)UCD Alumni Buddy Programme 2024/25